不是爱情就是性

　　In the near future, aliens have invaded Earth and declared a galactic war resulting in thousands of human casualties. To save Earth, a team of four teenage astronauts brave the alien wilderness of a distant planet to stop an assassin from changing the course of history forever.

一天清晨，刑警惊觉自己的搭档失去了音讯。事实上，搭档在夜晚返家的途中，意外目睹一起犯罪行为。不料现场突然发生提款机爆炸，她身受重伤，随即被犯人绑走。

　　30年代的香港，社局动荡，黑帮林立。香港大亨胡老头这日找到私家侦探哎吆（林子祥 饰），要求其调查胡太太，因为他觉得胡太太这些天表现奇怪。哎吆调查后发现，原来是坏蛋神父卡邦派（麦嘉 饰）人勾搭上了胡太，意欲偷取胡老头价值连城的股票。他们这一计划遭哎吆撞破后，四处追杀哎吆。　　哎吆亡命之际，又发现了胡老头其实并非什么香港大亨，只是一名老千，他来香港的目的就是要骗卡邦等流氓的钱。胡老头邀请哎吆入伙，一起设局骗卡邦。和好友探长罗宾（泰迪•罗宾 饰）商量后，哎吆决定来个将计就计。

　　Joe is an Alien on Earth. At least that is what his father told him before he died when Joe was eleven. He finds it difficult to adjust, and to find a compatible girl friend