美味的爱情和精灵

 公元1126年，北宋靖康元年。漠北女真人以4万铁骑入侵中原。由于太上皇宋徽宗的昏聩以及军备疏散，金兵长驱直入，如入无人之境。一路烧杀抢掠，直攻到东京汴梁。城破之日，金兵虏徽、钦二帝，是为靖康之耻。此后钦宗之弟赵高继位，是为高宗。一代英雄岳飞护佑高宗，被困牛头山。为迫岳飞投降，金将兀术派二太子金弹子（张成忠 饰）、三公主银铃子（张希玲 饰）和张兆奴（张跃宁 饰）前去偷袭岳家庄，欲虏岳母以作要挟。岳飞之子岳云（寻峰 饰）自幼喜好舞枪弄棒，一双银锤使得风生水起。他闻听父亲被困牛头山，计划偷偷前往助阵，却被几个兄弟掣肘。牛皋之子牛通（刘卫民 饰）偶然遇见伪装后的金弹子等人，无意中得知偷袭计划，于是连忙赶往岳家庄报信。得知消息的岳家小将们整饬装备，等待即将到来的一场大战……

小说家李唐（张本煜 饰）接到昔日恋人高丽（王佳佳 饰）的电话，被告知她要来他所在的城市出差三天。在这三天里，他们一起回到了过去，体验了当下，演绎了未来。在他们即将告别时，高丽带着李唐来到玄武湖，她讲述起一件往事，李唐对此错愕无言，恍然间不知当下是何时……

　　在喜玛拉雅山长大的亚星（郑中基）练有一身瑜伽好功夫，某日奉父母之命下山参加印度西施家族举办的瑜伽选夫比赛的途中，被恨嫁的大家姐（应采儿）缠住。为了阻止亚星参加比赛，大家姐想出把他变成人见人厌的坏小子的狠招，不想联合三大恶人也没能将亚星改变，不甘心之下，大家姐又找来以坏混世的大胆叔叔（吴镇宇）。　　可惜大胆叔叔与朋友惊青舅父（刘青云）及其两个外甥已不幸被印度催眠术催眠，连自己是谁都不再晓得，然而亚星总算找到了领门人，赌场的两头神蛇把他教成了沉迷于赌博和吸毒的坏小子，此时，大家姐发现还是原来的亚星比较好，决定陪其一同喝下“印度神奇油”回到从前。

　　Set in an underground dungeon inhabited by bundled, ragged human beings, after the nuclear holocaust. The story follows the wanderings of a hero through the situations of survival. People wait for the Ark to arrive and rescue them while their habitat falls apart.　　Delving deep into the dusty and long abandonded vaults of b-cinema in search of lost gems always leaves me with a bittersweet taste. On one hand the discovery of unexpected gems where no one would think them possible is a rewarding experience. On the other hand though it makes one wonder how many of these remarkable low-budget oddities, personal love affairs of directors never quite famous and now all but forgotten, have almost forever slipped from memory?　　n any case what we have here is a little post-apocalyptic gem from Poland that is really better than it has any right to. The dystopian near future of O-BI, O-BA finds a group of survivors of the nuclear war that ravaged the Earth inhabiting an underworld concrete bunker and biding their time as they wait for the mysterious Ark, an air ship of some kind that will come and save them. The Ark proves to be an elaborate hoax, carefully designed to give hope to the malnourished and desperate denizens of the bunker, while in the meantime the dome that separates their miserable existence from the nuclear winter outside is slowly caving in.　　What first striked me about the movie is the design of the bunker and the depiction of the survivors. The survivors are gaunt, filthy and terrible-looking penitents, dressed in rags and aimlessly wandering the neon-lit halls of the bunker like automatons. The bunker is a rundown, seedy place, with bright neon lights peering from all sides like the eyes of malignant beasts.　　On one hand it is a slightly 80's depiction of the dystopian future but the movie never stoops down to MAD MAX cheese. Instead it combines biting political satire with the bleak outlook of a world with no future, black comedy with barbs on apathy, religion and power. The survivors, for example, are fed some kind of flour dropping from a tube that hovers in the air - later on we discover the food supervisor uses books and the Bible itself as filler for this meagre meal. There are many such short symbolic touches, perhaps not life-changing or faith-restoring, yet playful, clever and inspired.　　One thing is for sure; O-BI, O-BA is not your run-of-the-mill sci-fi schlock. It overcomes its modest budget with creativity and has genuine artistic aspirations both from a writing and directing perspective. My opinion is that it should have been filmed in black and white instead of colour though. The director uses atmospheric light and shadow to great effect and it would have registered even better in stark black and white. The blue-green neon on the other hand outstays its welcome after a while. Just a minor gripe in an otherwise solid b-movie with its heart set in all the right places.　　Imagine a less bleak THE ROAD (Cormac McCarthy) being injected with the satire and humour of DR.STRANGELOVE and you're getting there. See it if you can find it.