JVID【孟若羽】《极乐按摩湿》屁眼不可以掰开！

　　故事发生在苏格兰一个名叫英维思的偏远宁静小镇。夜幕愈加浓重，年轻女警官瑞秋（Pollyanna McIntosh 饰）被闹钟唤醒，她有条不紊穿戴整齐，随后出门行走在空无一人的街道中央。在某个路口，瑞秋目击不远处站着一位老人，但随后老人被一辆飞驰而来的汽车撞到。瑞秋冲上前去，然而并未看到被撞之人，她只得将肇事者凯撒（布莱恩·沃纳 Brian Vernel 饰）扭送回警局，与麦克·瑞德警长（道格拉斯·罗素 Douglas Russell 饰）一同审问。稍后凯撒被关入牢房，而警局的同事也找到了那名神秘且一言不发的受伤老人。　　令人难以置信的是，老人似乎拥有直抵他人内心的能力，同时也让对方暴走疯狂，这注定是一个不平凡的夜晚……

在本作品中，人们听了从某个卡式录音带中流淌出的“某个旋律”后，自己也渐渐哼唱起了那个旋律，被卷入了不可思议的事件中。

　　在金融中心如矣岛从事股票基金工作的黄宇真外表光鲜，但生活究竟怎样苦乐自知。从小独自抚养他长大的父亲病重在床，巨大的生活压力令他不得不向高利贷借款，却又似乎背上更为沉重的包袱。在此期间，他和妻子的关系逐渐冷淡，并出现裂痕；而老实木讷的他在公司又受到部长和后辈排挤，面临被裁员的命运，　　在某个沮丧的夜晚，醉酒而归的黄宇真重逢儿时的玩伴正勋。正勋从小自称正义的化身，他多次帮助宇真排忧解难。当晚，宇真一句无心之言，次日后辈竟被人杀害，而他的事业似乎也出现了转机。在此之后，接连有令宇真厌烦的人离奇死亡，似乎那个正义的朋友暗中出手帮助了他……

　　Set in an underground dungeon inhabited by bundled, ragged human beings, after the nuclear holocaust. The story follows the wanderings of a hero through the situations of survival. People wait for the Ark to arrive and rescue them while their habitat falls apart.　　Delving deep into the dusty and long abandonded vaults of b-cinema in search of lost gems always leaves me with a bittersweet taste. On one hand the discovery of unexpected gems where no one would think them possible is a rewarding experience. On the other hand though it makes one wonder how many of these remarkable low-budget oddities, personal love affairs of directors never quite famous and now all but forgotten, have almost forever slipped from memory?　　n any case what we have here is a little post-apocalyptic gem from Poland that is really better than it has any right to. The dystopian near future of O-BI, O-BA finds a group of survivors of the nuclear war that ravaged the Earth inhabiting an underworld concrete bunker and biding their time as they wait for the mysterious Ark, an air ship of some kind that will come and save them. The Ark proves to be an elaborate hoax, carefully designed to give hope to the malnourished and desperate denizens of the bunker, while in the meantime the dome that separates their miserable existence from the nuclear winter outside is slowly caving in.　　What first striked me about the movie is the design of the bunker and the depiction of the survivors. The survivors are gaunt, filthy and terrible-looking penitents, dressed in rags and aimlessly wandering the neon-lit halls of the bunker like automatons. The bunker is a rundown, seedy place, with bright neon lights peering from all sides like the eyes of malignant beasts.　　On one hand it is a slightly 80's depiction of the dystopian future but the movie never stoops down to MAD MAX cheese. Instead it combines biting political satire with the bleak outlook of a world with no future, black comedy with barbs on apathy, religion and power. The survivors, for example, are fed some kind of flour dropping from a tube that hovers in the air - later on we discover the food supervisor uses books and the Bible itself as filler for this meagre meal. There are many such short symbolic touches, perhaps not life-changing or faith-restoring, yet playful, clever and inspired.　　One thing is for sure; O-BI, O-BA is not your run-of-the-mill sci-fi schlock. It overcomes its modest budget with creativity and has genuine artistic aspirations both from a writing and directing perspective. My opinion is that it should have been filmed in black and white instead of colour though. The director uses atmospheric light and shadow to great effect and it would have registered even better in stark black and white. The blue-green neon on the other hand outstays its welcome after a while. Just a minor gripe in an otherwise solid b-movie with its heart set in all the right places.　　Imagine a less bleak THE ROAD (Cormac McCarthy) being injected with the satire and humour of DR.STRANGELOVE and you're getting there. See it if you can find it.